I'm thrilled to announce that yesterday, after 11 1/2 years of being treated by my surgeon, going through surgery after surgery, and not going more than a year without a check up and full set of x-rays ...

He asked about lengthening my leg, which I do want to do in the future. I am thinking next summer, depending on my weight at the time. I told him what I had in mind and asked him about revising my scar at that time (ie. plastic surgery w/o a plastic surgeon.) He said he'd be more than happy to do that. He took out a lot of scar tissue on my arm and made it look 90% more attractive, so having that done to my thigh would be awesome.

The funny part is it didn't click that I don't have to come back. I went to pay on my balance & pick up my prescription, and the receptionist asked when I need to reschedule. Then she looked at the slip he had given her and said "oh, you don't have to!" That's when it hit us all. My x-ray tech, who's been taking my pictures for a few years took one look at me and burst into tears. That got me going. That got the receptionist going. That got Carla, a nurse from when I had the car crash (seriously, she took care of me in the hospital, that's where she worked then!) started in. My x-ray tech, she said that it gave her goose bumps knowing what I've been through and realizing I've now been told "hey, you are physically alright now."

Dr.C was thrilled with how my arm is working. As soon as I said "look! a pony tail!" he started sporting a grin that went from ear to ear. After hearing what I can do with my arm he just kept grinning bigger. His instructions were to keep on doing what I'm doing and it will keep getting stronger and better. Of course, he let me know that if I need to see him, he's always my doctor.

I'm no longer under the care and supervision of a surgeon. I've not been able to say this since I was 25 years old. I have spent the last 11 years waiting for the next part to need repair. I wouldn't sleep for days before my annual check up because I feared the words "we really need to go in there and _________." I've shed a million tears hearing news I just didn't want to hear. I've spent 10 years alone with the subconscious thought each time I picked something up with my left arm "is this the time the rod snaps?" I've laid in bed wondering just how my arm would break down and how painful it would be. The rod wasn't suppose to last forever, then I was suppose to get an artificial elbow and wait for that to distruct. I was suppose to live my life with restrictions.

Well, one more surgery will put me to as close to normal as I can ever hope. The last one is a major one. External hardware that gets cranked every day. One millimeter a day, I'll crank it. Each crank will be a millimeter closer to my legs being even. It's expected to take at least 8 weeks. At the end I will be level. With that surgery I go back to my full height. With that surgery, I get to wear shoes that are both the same height.

It will take me at least a year to be in the right mental place for that surgery. That one is work and endurance. The less I weigh, the easier it will be on me. Dr.C agreed that taking the time to get the weight off and be healthy is worth it in my recovery. He made it clear I don't have to be XXX pounds, but that it would make a difference.

Either way, the surgery I have left is going to be hard work, it's just undeniable that being a normal size will make it easier for me and give me better results. It will be easier to move my body if I weigh 100 and something vs. 200 and something. Plain logic there.

Until then though, I'm free. I have approximately 3 more months of bi-weekly therapy to keep my shoulder free while my arm strengthens, and then I'm done with that. I'm not quite sure what I'll do with myself then. It will feel very odd.

But I think I'll like it ........

::If at any point you don't like my opinion::
::you don't have to share the same::
::Isn't the free world amazing that way?::
::Individuality rocks!::

::The people in my diary are just that, people.::
::If you think you are one of them,::
::then only admit it if you are one of the good ones!::
::If your are hurt and offended thinking you::
::are someone negatively mentioned in my diary,::
::stop doing what you are doing!::
::Perhaps you'll see me write nicer stuff about you!::
::If you think you know me and::
::are dying of curiousity, email me.::
::I won't promise to tell you,::
::but at least I'll know you're out there!!::